Ever since Alistair Overeem started eating babies “eating horse meat” there have been whispers that Overeem’s physique was on the wrong side of the vial. Overeem was an enigma, who remained heavyweight champ of Strikeforce despite defending the title only once in three years. If he had been a fighting champion there’s no question it would have helped Strikeforce put out a more competitive product to better compete with UFC.

Despite the steroids rumors, Overeem was a big score for the UFC; he was a legit heavyweight and the division needed them. Overeem was immediately awarded a fight against former heavyweight champion Brock Lesnar, beating him in the first round DESPITE the fact that he technically skipped town before his drug screening for THAT FIGHT, and got a conditional license from Nevada for the fight. Despite all the red flags though, Overeem delivered and he was rewarded with a title shot against Junior Dos Santos for UFC 146.

Dash my hopes and dreams, FOX SPORTS:

Overeem, along with all other main-card fighters, was tested at a press conference in Las Vegas to promote the UFC 146 pay-per-view event, at which Overeem was scheduled to take on UFC heavyweight champion Junior dos Santos. “The Demolition Man’s” sample came back showing an elevated level of testosterone, a result that indicates the illegal use of testosterone as a performance enhancing substance.

There’s still a chance that the “B” sample of Overeem’s urine will come back negative, but don’t hold your breath, this fight is probably not going to happen. Be ready to watch Frank Mir take on Dos Santos, which could be okay except Mir is inconsistent.

At the risk of going Florio on everybody here, it’s absolute bullshit that Overeem was able to put the UFC in this position in the first place. The UFC pushed Brock Lesnar to the moon when he first arrived in UFC, he was given a heavyweight title shot after just three fights, and now he’s back in WWE, so why didn’t White learn anything from that experience? Why was a rematch against Velasquez for Dos Santos so out of the question?

The Federal Trade Commission is currently looking into whether or not the UFC has an illegal monopoly on mixed-martial-arts in the U.S. (what about Bellator??) and since UFC purchased Strikeforce last year, and then decided to continue to run it as a seperate (but “equal”) promotion I think it’s clear that this concern is overblown. After all, ESPN Outside of the Lines did a terrific report chronicling how the UFC actively blackballs U.S. fighters who have the audacity to complain about their compensation, and then UFC feels free to pluck Dan Henderson, Nick Diaz, Jake Shields (to be fair he signed while Strikeforce was independent of UFC), and Alistair Overeem to UFC.

But turn those frowns upside down Strikeforce fans, because they just poached one of UFC’s prized guys…granted he had been released from the promotion and looking for work for a year.

Less than a year after his departure from UFC, Marquardt has signed a new deal with Strikeforce to compete in their welterweight division.

Yay!

Ironically enough, while Marquardt was released last year from his UFC contract after elevated testosterone levels kept him out of his scheduled fight at UFC on Versus 4 against Rick Story, the Colorado based fighter never actually competed in another promotion.

Marquardt was signed to the British promotion BAMMA and was expected to debut in February, but after multiple delays the fighter asked and received his release from the organization.

The world is your oyster, Nate.

Ex-aerobics instructor and bald Vince McMahon Dana White has been on a subtle mission to ruin Strikeforce since the UFC announced that it was purchasing the U.S. fight promotion earlier this year. While the UFC is indeed the top dog in the U.S., with apologies to Bellator, Strikeforce still represented an alternative to see fights from people who didn’t have to kiss Dana’s ass, or who the UFC demonstrated no patience for in earlier forays. Strikeforce brought us the likes of King Mo, Fedor, Gina Carano, and Alistair Overeem.

First, we saw Jake Shields shift over to the Octagon, then Strikeforce occasional heavyweight champion Alistair Overeem was announced to fight in December against Brock Lesnar (boing!), and now Strikeforce lightweight champion Gilbert Melendez is likely to make the switch.

Pull guard and sink in a guillotine, ESPN:

UFC president Dana White said he wants to have Melendez in his promotion very soon.

“We do want to bring Gilbert Melendez over [to UFC] and we’re looking at it right now,” White said Saturday night. “We’re going to bring him over ASAP.”

It was believed that Melendez (19-2) would defend his Strikeforce title in December against Jorge Masvidal. But White further emphasized his desire to have Melendez’s next fight be in UFC.

“We’re looking to bring him over right now,” White said.

White refused to guarantee a title shot for Melendez in his first UFC bout, but he would not rule it out.

“It’s a possibility.” White said. “The thing is, that division is stacked.

“And usually timing has a lot to do with it.”

The article goes on to note that, in total, four Strikeforce champions have vacated, including Dan Henderson, and welterweight Nick Diaz, and they are all in UFC now. Meanwhile, Paul Daley sits by the phone pretending to play bridge, and Keith Jardine is probably underneath a bridge right now sharing a can of turpentine with Boxcar Joe after they boxed for a sandwich. Where is my source for this information, your mom, that’s who!! (points to crotch).

But you already knew this, right?

It absolutely pains me to see Strikeforce become the red-headed stepchild of the fight game as the UFC toys with shuttering the organization altogether after acquiring the company in March.

Although UFC was interested in several fighters, one of the top prizes for them had to be Alistair Overeem, the “fighting champion” who at one point appeared to prefer boxing exhibitions halfway around the world to fighting with top-flight security guards competition in the UFC. Well, like my days of peering into women’s locker rooms with my zany friends at Angel Beach High School, Overeem has turned a new leaf, agreeing to join the UFC to fight Sable sodomizer Brock Lesnar.

Fight fans will note that Lesnar was seriously humbled by Cain Velasquez last October at UFC 121, losing the strap, and then gaining another life-threatening bout of diverticulitis. He reemerged recently to hunt prairie dogs and consume beef jerky and declare himself good as new. Works for me.

Roll around on the ground with me, LA Times:

“Brock is a big name, a dangerous guy, and this is a dream matchup,” Overeem said Tuesday.

“I want to see this fight myself. Overall, I’m a different fighter. A striker, athletic, big. These are going to be two big trucks going at it on a collision course.”

The 6-foot-5, 260-pound Overeem, 31, is a former K-1 kickboxing champion. He most recently defended his Strikeforce belt in June with a unanimous decision over takedown specialist Fabrio Werdum, who had previously defeated Fedor Emelianenko.

Lesnar, 34, has been out of action since losing his UFC heavyweight belt to Cain Velasquez in October at the Honda Center. Lesnar has been suffering from the intestinal ailment diverticulitis.

The Dec. 30 winner will be first in line to fight the winner of a Nov. 12 fight between Velasquez and Junior Dos Santos.

Lesnar never got to fight Dos Santos after the last season of the Ultimate Fighter. Which was fine with me because I wanted to stop watching so many fights and spend more time with my kids (bursts into laughter). I bet myself I could type that sentence without laughing…looks like I get to buy myself some bestiality porn.

Recent-UFC-punching-bag Shane Carwin has been in a bit of a funk since completely shitting the bed against Brock Lesnar at UFC 116. Carwin is a mechanical engineer, which means that he is huge and a genius, perhaps an evil genius even, like some DC comics villain we all know.

Bloody Elbow posted about this here, but Carwin’s posting can be found here:

I had a chance to speak with him at the Magic Convention in Las Vegas (no we were not the big and tall models) and he said that he and Dana were close to a deal and he would likely be in the UFC before 2012. I think he would make a great addition to the roster.

When I decided that I was going to try for the UFC the HWT division was not nearly as stacked as it is today. The up and coming guys have tons of talent and heart and the top of the division is full of super talented guys. I am excited about all of the potential fights. I have gone to war with many of these guys in my mind and I can’t wait for an opportunity to hit and be ht by them.

Personally, I would love to see Carwin fight Overeem. For me, that would be on the same par as Superman vs. Batman, or Briana loves Jenna, if you will.

(adjusts monocle, swishes scotch glass, turns page in “Jugs” magazine)