You know times are ill when you can’t score in Bangkok. Tiger Woods lost his number one ranking to Lee Westwood. He then flamed out of the appropriately named World Golf Salutes King Bhumibol Skins Tournament in Thailand the following week finishing last out of four. He should have rolled with Gary Glitter. He can bag a win anywhere in southeast Asia.

Tiger is now off to Australia where he’ll compete in the Australian Masters, the last tournament he won before he went to town on Perkins and caught a golf club upside the head. Tournament officials are warning spectators that they shouldn’t heckle him about his “troubles”. We assume they’re talking about his standards. He should be thoroughly mocked for them. Fans will receive one warning before being ejected if they start trouble. In other words, make the first taunt count.

100,000 fans are expected over the course of the tournament. Now we expect that someone can come up with something good to rattle Tiger. We challenge anyone in attendance to one up this kangaroo.

Imagine if he did this in front of Tiger instead of Rory Sabbatini? Genius. In the words of Homer Simpson, “It works on so many levels”

Although Tiger will be protected, spectators will be permitted to berate Sergio Garcia at will until he cries.

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