Joel Monaghan Takes DMX Literally With Disastrous Results

Who can forget DMX? A brilliant mix of infectous stupidity and ignorance that was impossible to deny. 1998 brought “It’s Dark and Hell is Hot”. It wasn’t long before he reached even higher heights with tracks like “What’s My Name” and “What These Bitches Want”. Bet you never read the lyrics. Amazing. He’s loved all over the world from France to Australia. Canberra Raiders center Joel Monaghan loves him so much, he decided to make a photo tribute while drunk. To say he took “Get At Me, Dog” the wrong way would be the understatement of the year.

Monaghan is facing a Randy Moss-style release from the Raiders after a picture emerged of him in a sex act with a dog. He, along with several teammates, got loaded during Canberra’s Mad Monday festival and somehow ended up have a dog go to town on his kibbles and bits if you know what I mean. If that wasn’t bad enough, someone posted the picture on Twitter where it quickly made the rounds.

Canberra CEO Don Furner was dumbfounded and appalled by the image of Monaghan and a dog, which was posted on the social network site Twitter before Melbourne radio station SEN named the Raider yesterday morning.

Monaghan admitted to being the person in the picture and issued a statement through his manager.

“Joel can’t blame anyone but himself for an act of stupidity that will haunt him for the rest of his life,” Banaghan said.

“Joel wants to make it clear that he was the one playing a prank on an absent teammate by simulating the act.

“There are no words of explanation that can be offered because none can be appropriate.

“Joel has to now face his family as well as fans and supporters with that shame and has already undergone counselling to help him cope with the consequences of what has happened.

“It was a moment of abject stupidity brought about by too much drink and a complete lack of any thought process.

“The fact that someone has sought to compound the situation further by the use of social media only adds to the trauma, but Joel accepts that it is his actions alone that are at fault.

Ah yes. Blame the messenger for having a dog all up on your nuts like a squirrel. Luckily for Monaghan, bestiality isn’t illegal in the ACT so he won’t face any charges. He still has to deal with a pissed off and rejected dog. “You expect me to just go away after I service you? I will not be ignored!”

Monaghan entered counseling or beasthab for an undetermined amount of time. He’d probably be better off moving to Tasmania where he wouldn’t have to hide his shame.

We managed to find a SFW picture of the incident. It’s greened out enough so you can’t see the unpleasantness. If you’re sick, sorry interested enough, it’s after the jump. Enjoy!

Tagged with: Australia • Bestiality Is Wrong • Canberra Raiders • DMX • Joel Monaghan • Rugby

Filed under: Uncategorized

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