Monday, March 23, 2009

Vasectomies And College Basketball. Together At Last


Most men prefer the natural method of drinking copious amounts of alcohol to prevent their boys from swimming. How often has the statement "I'd have to drink enough to down a wildebeest and then some before I do that" been heard before a poor decision is made later in the evening? These men also know that an excuse to get out of work or a pressing engagement to watch sports is just that. It's an excuse and nothing more. It's not supposed to be taken literally. Someone might want to send a newsletter out because some men are taking their March Madness excuses a bit too far.

A large group of men use the NCAA tournament as an excuse to get out of work. No problem. We've all been there. However some are also using the tournament as a foil for their vasectomies.

"I'm booked up," said Dr. J. Stephen Jones, chairman of regional urology at the Cleveland Clinic's Glickman Urological and Kidney Institute. "My schedule on that part of the month filled up very quickly. It filled up ahead of time."

Scheduling the procedure to coincide with hoops hoopla makes perfect sense, says Jones, who has done more than 2,000 vasectomies.
Perfect sense? My idea of enjoying the NCAA tournament involves macrobrews and fried food. It doesn't involve a frozen bag of peas on my balls. The Oregon Urology Institute is offering pizza and a bag of frozen peas as gifts for men that sign up for the snip during the tournament.

Don't worry, boys. I'll stop you the old-fashioned way with a case of Busch Light or Natty Bo.

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